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The Acceptable Workplace Touque Hair Limit

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The "Acceptable Workplace Touque Hair Limit" is the minimum temperature wherein "Touque Hair" becomes acceptable, BY LAW in any workplace in Canada. Once the "Acceptable Workplace Touque Hair Limit" has been reached, all citizens must be allowed perform his or her workplace duties, be they a teacher, judge, television news anchor, or politician, regardless of whether or not they suffer from "Touque Hair", and cannot be disciplined, reprimanded in any way shape or form.

The "Acceptable Workplace Touque Hair Limit" is set by the provinces and territories and is as follows:

Albert, Saskatchewan, Manitoba, Yukon, Northwest Territories, Nunavut -25 C
Western Ontario: -17.5 C
Southern Ontario: -8 C
Quebec: -20 C
Nova Scotia, Prince Edward Island, New Brunswick, Newfoundland and Labrador: -19 C
British Columbia: +2

Employers who discipline or reprimand employees for hair related offenses when the "Acceptable Workplace Touque Hair Limit" has been reached can be charged under "Her Majesty's Criminal Code of the Dominion of Canada" and are subject to fines in excess of $300,000 and/or having their own individual touque privileges revoked.